Who was St. Valentine? A 3rd-century bishop or priest or perhaps a wealthy citizen in Rome. Today is his feast day which is associated with a tradition of romantic love. His story is a sweet and sad one.
He was from Terni, in central Italy. While under house arrest of Judge Asterius, and discussing his faith with him, Valentine told him about Jesus. So the judge put Valentine to the test. He had a daughter who was blind. If Valentine succeeded in restoring the girl's sight, Asterius would believe and he would do whatever he asked. Valentinus, praying to God, laid his hands on her eyes and the girl's vision was restored.
Immediately humbled, the judge asked Valentine what he should do. Valentine replied that all of the idols around the judge's house should be broken, and that the judge should fast for three days and then be baptized. The judge obeyed and went so far as to free all the Christian prisoners under his authority. The judge, his family, and his forty-four member household of adult family members and servants were baptized.
Valentine continued his ministry to persecuted Christians, though, was later arrested again. He was sent to the prefect of Rome, to the emperor Claudius himself. Claudius took a liking to him until Valentine tried to convince Claudius to convert to Christianity. Claudius refused and demanded that Valentine either renounce his faith or he would be executed.
Valentine refused to turn away from his faith. So he was executed on February 14, in 269 CE. Before his execution, Saint Valentine wrote a note to Asterius's daughter, the girl whose sight had been restored, which was signed “from your Valentine” which is said to have "inspired today's romantic missives".
That story is pretty much lost to history. What survives is the cultural pieces that go into acknowledging the day. Now it’s a lot more about Hallmark and See’s Candy and 1-800-FLOWERS than St. Valentine.
As a child growing up in the 1960’s, it was an annual ritual to give little cards with cute pictures and clever sayings to school classmates. I put a picture of those on the cover of the bulletin. Like so many things now, you can find photos of them on-line if I include in the search the word “vintage.”
I remember the excitement of going to the drug store with my mom and picking out a box of these little valentine cards. There were a few sets of 30 or so cards to choose from – it was such fun picking them out.
It was fun – picking out the cutest card for your best friend, picking out a card with a cat for your friend who liked cats. Writing that note – “to my best friend Lucy from your best friend Carole.” There always came that moment – when you had to address a card to a classmate you really didn’t like. Or you thought didn’t like you.
What to do…? Just skip them figuring that they wouldn’t notice that a card from you was missing? Or just go ahead and write “to Chuck from Carole” and steel myself for the fallout. Chuck was loud and a bully. And I was shy and sort of artsy. I tried to stay away from him. And hope for the best.
On Valentines Day all the kids brought show boxes they had decorated with a slot in the top. We all played mail carrier, delivering a valentine to the other students. And that night I remember sitting on the floor of the living room opening each little card, reading who it was from. It was amazing being surrounded by these colorful little missives of care free fun and “love.”
I wonder if they still do this in elementary schools – this practice of love. I know how it made me feel, but what do children think about love? And why does it matter?
A group of researchers asked that same thing. And then they asked seven-year-olds, “what does love mean to you?” The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone might imagined. See what you think...
“When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love."
"When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth."
"Love is what makes you smile when you're tired."
"Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK."
"If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate." (That’s from 6-year-old Nikka – I could have used that advice when I was addressing that valentine to Chuck. We could use a few more Nikka’s I think.)
"Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen."
"Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well."
"During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn't scared anymore."
"Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken."
"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Bradley Cooper. But she’s fibbing."
"Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day."
"When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you." What an image!
"You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget to do that."
So children talk about love as tangible actions, deep feelings, and simple, powerful actions. Love is made manifest to them through acts of service, about feeling safe, about deep comfort and shared presence like smiling even when you’re tired. They express love through hugs, kindness, sharing, and simple gestures, learning from family examples and pets, seeing it as warmth, safety, and unconditional acceptance.
Why is this important to us?
Jesus encouraged us to "become like little children." In little ones we see the necessary “heart posture” for entering the kingdom of heaven: total humility, dependence on God, and trusting faith instead of self-sufficiency. In a culture that prizes status, Jesus highlights that the greatest in heaven are those with the humility of a child.
Just as little ones depend on parents for survival, we must rely on God for strength, provision, and spiritual life, crying out to God for God’s strength and wisdom and peace when faced with fear or weakness.
Jesus was not advocating for childishness or immaturity, but rather a "childlike" spirit—a shift from pride to humble dependency.
In doing so we might just fine that Love is the ultimate medicine. Science and ancient wisdom agree: love is a powerful force for healing. Whether it’s through heartfelt connections, mindful breathing, or simple acts of kindness, love has the ability to reduce stress and strengthen your heart.
The HeartMath Institute has discovered that the heart sends more signals to the brain than the brain sends to the heart—influencing emotions, thoughts, and even physical health. In fact, research shows that your heart’s rhythm changes based on emotions like love, compassion, and gratitude.
The heart produces oxytocin, a powerful hormone associated with bonding, emotional healing, and stress reduction. Whether you’re hugging a loved one, practicing self-love, or expressing gratitude, you’re actively supporting your immune system, lowering blood pressure, and even improving digestion.
Love isn’t just about romance—it’s also about self-compassion, forgiveness, and connection. Practices like meditation, gratitude, and heart-centered breathing can help us recover from the emotional bruises of PTSD, anxiety, and emotional wounds. Engaging in acts of kindness and compassion allow our bodies to respond with a surge of positive biochemicals that boost well-being.
Research suggests that people who regularly practice love and kindness have healthier hearts and longer lifespans. That’s the way God made our bodies, that’s our incredibly compassionate God in action, accompanying us through times that are difficult to help us recover from times of grief.
So today, take a deep breath, focus on your heart, and let the love of God lead the way. Amen.